Friday, August 7, 2009

Wow, that was an interesting week.

On Tuesday I told you about a woman who would be looking at our profile on Wednesday. She chose us to "meet" that afternoon. On Thursday we were scheduled at 3 for a phone interview. Let me tell you the 24 hours between 3 on Wednesday and 3 on Thursday were the best 24 hours of my life. I can't describe the relief and happiness that washed over me.

And then, 4:00 Thursday came and she'd not called. It's amazing how fast the cookie can crumble. The story may not end here, there may be much more. But for now, we're completely uncertain.

I hope with all of my heart that she calls. I gave permission for her to call my cell directly if she'd rather not go through a conference call. I thought it might make her feel more comfortable, but so far she's not gotten back in touch with her counsellor. The counsellor is happy to give her the number should she want it though.

So if by chance you're reading this K. We're not mad, we know how hard this must be for you. We're here for you, regardless of what happens with little V. A. We do want to be her parents, we would be honored to be her parents. And we would be even more honored if you would trust us with your heart as well. We want to love you too. It doesn't have to stop here. It can go on, we can be a different kind of family. All you have to do is give us a chance. Together we can do anything, separately we are only two families in need. Reach out. For the sake of your family just call Erin and ask for my number. There is a way to do this that can change the world. Let's stand Open Adoption on it's ear and give hope to people who don't believe it can work. You, Jer and me, together.

Dear Lord,
I pray that K and her children are safe. I pray they are warm and secure, that they are being taken care of. That they are not alone. Please Dear Lord, show us a way through this world where there is no light in the tunnel of fear. Don't let this fear stand between two women who could do so much together. Be a lamp unto our feet and help us find a way to one another. Help K. trust her gut when it told her to choose Jeremiah and Kelley. Help her overcome her fears and come back to Bethany. If not for adoption, for support. We love her.
Help me to accept what may not be possible.
Amen

6 comments:

Jamie said...

tears are just streaming down my face.....praying this is not the "end", but only the beginning. much love to you....hang in there:)

Kel said...

Don't cry Jamie, as sad as we all feel right now, just think how wonderful the happiness will feel when the time comes, I have a feeling it will be exponentially more wonderful than the sadness we're enduring right now.

Love and big hugs, I have family in Glendale that we'll be visiting when we do get our baby, and your family will be getting a visit when it happens! Maybe we'll go to Mariner's Spring training this year and we can watch a game together :D.

Melba said...

Kel,

Yet again your sweet and genuine spirit shines through these words. I too feel sad at all of the happenings of this week, and I have been worried about you. I am also still confident that God is leading you to YOUR baby, whether it's this sweet little girl or not.

Hang in there...and know you are not alone through this time.

Hugs,

Melba

Kel said...

Thank you Melba, it is always a comfort to me to know that others are standing here with me.

Don't worry too much, I went through some dark times once, and I've learned that time is far to precious to spend depressed for long. I feel deeply and heal quickly. It is a strange way to be, I don't wallow, but I allow myself to feel the full force of pain, and then, I let it go. Knowing that God has my back and with Him, all of my friends too. I think some people are afraid to be cut, but...growth hurts. And that is how I roll!

Jamie said...

kel ~ your spirit just floors me. :) you are a wonderful wonderful woman and I CAN'T WAIT to get a visit from you!!!!!! :) that would be such a special gift!!! :)

Kel said...

I'm so happy to have such good blogging friends, you all help keep me out of a pit of misery :)